Monday, February 4, 2013

Tried & True: Hangover Cure

Thank God the Super Bowl's over!  There are few things I hate more than watching a slew of overpaid jocks run around chasing a ball on a big fancy field.  While I admit I used to watch the annual televised sausage fest simply for the clever and often times edgy commercials and sometimes even for the mediocre half time shows, I have never otherwise been guilty of partaking as a spectator of the all-American pastime   To put in plainly, I think its stupid.  I also do not need an excuse to have friends over, make party food, get rowdy and drink to the point of excess.  I call that Tuesday.

And, while I would like to pretend that I was reading or practicing yoga, or better yet...reading the Torah in Down Dog while solving world hunger at the same time, I, shamefully was curled up in bed in a Kardashian coma.

....but I digress.  So, last night was Super Bowl Sunday...and this morning you are feeling.....  like you were just ran over by a Mack truck?  Too many chicken wings & beer?  Hair of the dog isn't always such a great idea on a Monday morning!  Though I can't cure you this morning  and I also cannot return the dignity you lost after consuming 3 cases of Bud Light (ick!), I am about to tell you a big secret that will stop you from feeling like dog shit the day after you throw caution to the wind and make like Charlie Sheen again.

The secret....Activated Charcoal.
Charcoal, you ask?  The same stuff I grill with?  Yes and no.  Charcoal is carbon.  Activated charcoal is charcoal that has been treated with oxygen   This results in a very porous charcoal.  The porousness of activated charcoal actually makes it adsorb contaminants and impurities.  Basically, it sticks to the shit that hurts you and then carries it out.  Since a hangover is the result of overloading your liver with junk, the charcoal actually takes the pressure off of your liver to metabolize all of the impurities 

Activated charcoal can adsorb most harmful substances before they damage your body.  Hospitals use activated charcoal for drug overdoses, poisonings and the like.

It is sold in capsules and you can purchase it at your local health food store or right HERE on Amazon:

Insert disclaimer here: Do NOT use activated charcoal as an excuse to drink excessively or overdose on heroin.  While activated charcoal can be wonderful and truly the best hangover prevention if you must drink, it has its downfalls.  If taken often, if can cause constipation.  What happens when poo sits in your intestines?  It gets reabsorbed into your body.  Why is that terrible??  Because that poo sitting in your intestines with activated charcoal is also chock full of the same toxins you were trying to get rid of!  Reabsorb that and you may as well have never taken it.  That's asking for serious trouble.  Also, if you are taking any medications, vitamins, etc.  Activated charcoal may adhere to those as well, rendering your medication useless.  So, be careful.

To take for a hangover, take 1-2 capsules when you start drinking.

Of course, I don't believe everything I read and it just happened that it was Friday night.  So, in the name of science, I tested it.  I generally get some gnarly hangovers.  Saturday morning?  Fine.  Really.  I couldn't believe it myself.  Uh-mazing.  I would also recommend drinking a ton of water the next day to 'get things moving' don't want to clog your intestines with toxic sludge.

In addition, activated charcoal has 2 other great uses:

1.  Food poisoning.  If you feel a bout of food poisoning coming on, take 2 capsules.  It works best if taken within 30 minutes of consuming the contaminant. 

2.  Teeth Whitening.  I am trying this now so I cannot vouch for this myself, but apparently, it also adsorbs tannins and other stain causing irritants from coffee or red wine.  Brushing and rinsing with activated charcoal is supposed to brighten and whiten teeth.  Just dump a capsule into a small glass, add water to make a paste.  I am dipping my toothbrush in a thin paste and then putting my toothpaste on, brushing, rinsing, rinsing with activated charcoal water, then rinsing again.  Lots of rinsing is needed when brushing your teeth with BLACK charcoal.


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